Deb Sofield

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success

I don’t know a single successful person

I don’t know a single successful person that leaves their shopping cart in the middle of the parking lot. I freely admit that I am probably in the 2% of people who love to go grocery shopping. I always have a list, but I also like to wander the aisles to see what else is in the market. It’s not that I have to buy anything; I’m just fascinated by packaging, current must-have mineral waters, acai berry teas and live lobsters in the tank with the little rubber bands on their finger-crushing claws. I tend to shop everywhere because of […]

Don’t Hold on to Grudges

I have been thinking about a few clients that I work with, and have come to realize that there is one thing that seems to hold many of them back from being amazing rock star speakers. That one thing is an old hurt from someone in their past who is now irrelevant and who basically told them they were awful speakers and to keep quiet. Now I don’t know what the teacher or another adult actually said, but to a young person, what they heard was, “Don’t open your mouth again.” And here we are years later, and the idea […]

The Emotion of Fear

I am continuing with my series on emotions. I started the series with the emotion of anger because anger is a cancer to your soul. So, to have any chance for a successful and happy life, friend, you have to let it go. Then I talked about the pain of personal shame. Shame is a Failure to Meet Your Own Standard of Behavior, and this emotion will wreck your life if you’re not careful. And I added in the thought that you should stop thinking that others have to accept your forgiveness for you to be forgiven. They don’t. Once […]

The Emotion of Frustration

I am continuing with my series on emotions. I started the series with the emotion of anger because anger is a cancer to your soul. So, to have any chance for a successful and happy life, friend, you have to let it go. Then I talked about the pain of personal shame. Shame is a Failure to Meet Your Own Standard of Behavior, and this emotion will wreck your life if you’re not careful. And I added in the thought that you should stop thinking that others have to accept your forgiveness for you to be forgiven. They don’t. Once […]

Live in such a way that if anyone should speak badly of you no one would believe it

My friends send me email jokes and cartoons all the time; in fact I had a few friends I had to ask to put me on the weekly list and not the daily emails. I have no idea what they do all day that allows them to surf the web and send their network 20-30 jokes and stories all day-but good for them. A while back I get this one and I liked it…it said, Live in such a way that if anyone should speak badly of you no one would believe it. Wouldn’t that be great? What if you […]

3 Things I Need Each Day

With the 4th of July upon us, I think it best to let you rest and have a time of reflection on the holiday. That being said, if you can spare just a little over four minutes, I’d encourage you to watch this video clip of Matthew McConaughey’s acceptance speech upon winning Best Actor at the Oscars a few years ago. His short message of 3 Things I Need Each Day has deep meaning, and it is one of the few clips that I keep on my computer because I agree with him on the idea that we each need: 1) Something […]

Curiosity

Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateaturipukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiwhenuakitanatahu, Yes, that is my headline for today, but stay with me and learn why. I don’t know about you, but when I see something new, I file it away for a rainy day to pull out and review when I have some free time. I’ve been on the road for a few weeks now speaking at conferences, and when I was unpacking this week, I pulled out a crumpled piece of paper that was stuffed in my suitcase and it had this word (above) written at the top with the notation that it has 85 letters in the name. […]

The Emotion of Scarcity

I was on a plane this week and read an interesting book called Scarcity by Sendhil Mullainathan and Eldar Shafir. It was thought provoking from the standpoint that many people make serious life decisions based on a scarcity mindset. The book’s definition of scarcity is having less then you feel you need. Now, that definition is important on many levels, but today I want to discuss a few thoughts that really stood out to me especially when I think about how the mental emotion of scarcity can limit your vision for your life and your hopes and dreams for your […]

If You Want To Be Trusted Be Honest

Seems like a no brainer to be honest, but you and I know that some of our friends will skirt the truth for various reasons, none being worth the damage that a lie will yield. It makes perfect sense as you go through life, that if you want to be trusted, be honest. I had a friend who was notorious for telling (as she would explain) “little white lies,” as compared to green or blue lies, I guess. She wouldn’t even blink when telling a “little” mistruth, and over time I started to wonder where the “little lie” stopped and […]