Deb Sofield

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Hopes and Dreams

Garbage In, Garbage Out

Seriously, I have no idea why people watch TV. Consider this a rant (and forgive me if you feel otherwise): in the space of two minutes of my clicking through TV channels in my hotel room, I saw horrifying and gruesome abuse (directed towards women), physical beatings of men and women, vulgar language and inappropriate insinuation of harm to kids. And we wonder what is wrong with our world! I have never been a big TV watcher. I taught myself years ago to put down the remote down and pick up a book. While I love any TV adventure that […]

The Emotion of Jealousy

I am going to continue with my theme of emotions, which are causing you harm… because I want you to understand that you are more than how you feel, and you can (with help) heal the damaged places in your heart and mind. My first lesson was about anger, last week I talked about shame and this week I want to talk about jealousy. Oh, jealousy, the green-eyed monster that will wreck your perfectly happy home and make you (a normal person) become insane with rage and keep you at night fretting over things you can’t control. Other words for […]

Normal Is for Others. Amazing Is for You.

Recently I was speaking at a conference, and one of the other speakers quoted Maya Angelou, “If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how amazing you can be.” And I got to thinking that is a really great thought, IF you could convince yourself to let go of the low expectations you have placed on yourself, and then consider how working to be amazing would be a game changer for the rest of your life. What I have seen is that many people work and strive for “normal” (whatever that is), and in doing so, they give just enough instead of knocking […]

Do What Is Best for You

Recently I was listening to a story about the famous basketball player Rick Barry, and his underhand free throw shot that he made popular back in the day. It was a great story that he told about why he crafted his underhand toss and how it became a force for free throw points for his team. He recounted for the reporter that his underhand toss never took off in the big leagues because of the simple fact that no one wanted to be seen as doing a “granny shot.” Imagine that, being so cowed by others that many basketball players […]

If only our eyes saw souls

“If only our eyes saw souls instead of bodies, how very different our ideals of beauty would be.” ~ Unknown I came across a funny video the other day about how young people view older people. I’m posting the video here. How funny to watch the youngsters act out how an “old” person would walk across the street, text a message or do a jumping jack. And then to see them blown away by the attitudes and actions of these elders is simply a fun way to waste a few minutes of your day, and it shows us all how […]

Go Where You’re Celebrated, Not Tolerated

A while back I stepped down from a leadership position that I really enjoyed. I like to be called Boss Lady, but the reality is I do too much, so in order to take control of my world, I had to make some changes to protect the time I have to do the things that I am interested in doing and, in some cases, am required to do. It’s never easy stepping away from a project you birthed or created or really loved. But the fact is that in order to leave a legacy of success, there comes a time […]

Take A Chance

I’ve seen this poster a hundred times on school bulletin boards or coffee shop info boards and at Whole Foods on the community board. It was just recently though, for some unknown reason, it finally caught my attention. It’s an 8.5 x 11 sheet of paper and the bottom of the sheet is clipped so you can “pull a ticket.” The poster headline is “Take A Chance” and each ticket says: “Chance.” Interesting to see how many little slips of paper just hang on the sheet waiting to be taken. I guess some folks don’t see it as anything they’d […]

Oh, To Be Remembered

Oh, To Be Remembered This time of year I often think about Lucille Ball. We lost her 26 years ago although it doesn’t seem that long. I can remember coming home from school and watching I Love Lucy and laughing along with the cheesy laugh tracks on the screen, or when I was home sick, you could still find her show on some off channel for the reruns. I often use her life adventure in one of my talks about leadership. If you know her story, it is an amazing tale of survival. To be able to have the star […]

It is the courage to continue that counts

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”–Winston Churchill I am working with a terrific young man who will be giving the valedictorian address at his high school graduation in a few weeks. It’s been fun to hear him reminisce about his early days in high school when he “didn’t care,” to realizing one day that he was just a few points behind the smartest guy at school and knowing that with a little work he could overtake him, because, as he said, no one knew he was that smart since he […]